I’m stubborn. I’m sure God could use a man like that. I’m sure He’s planned to use me all along. I find myself having to come to the stark realization that maybe the Calvinists are right. I’ve embraced everything about Reformed theology except that one last point. The P-word. That’s predestination for you Arminians out there.

Nothing else can explain the events of my life. Nothing else can explain why God has patiently taught me through the reading of His Word and the gentle coaxing of my Pastor and the Elders. Why when I was bound and determined to enter a life of sin would God keep goading my conscience? Because He chose me long ago and therefore nothing will separate me from His love.

I don’t know whether to feel profound relief for my salvation or profound sorrow for those who are not saved. Couldn’t God elect everyone? Paul writes in Romans 9:20 that I really don’t have a right to expect an answer from God when questioned about decisions. I still feel a sense of loss for my family, the majority of which are not saved.

*Sigh.*

But then, I guess I don’t really know what’s in their hearts. Nor do I know who God’s elect are. My hope rests in the sacrifice Jesus made for me, His blood that was shed for me, God’s grace, and His ultimate and perfect mercy.

Good journey fellow traveller. I hope to see you on the far side of Judgement Day.